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"Joey's Baptism"
Season 6, episode # 22
# 130 overall in series (205 episodes)
"All in the Family" episode
Series: All in the Family
Network/Country: CBS-TV / USA
Air date February 23, 1976
Production code 622 (6x22)
Written by: Larry Rhine, Mel Tolkin & Milt Josefsberg
Directed by: Paul Bogart
Guest starring: Clyde Kusatsu
IMDb logo IMDb: Joey's Baptism
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Joey's Baptism was the 22nd episode in the sixth season of All in the Family, the 130th overall episode in the series. Co-written by Larry Rhine, Mel Tolkin and Milt Josefsberg, the episode, which was directed by Paul Bogart, originally aired on CBS-TV on February 23, 1976.

"Joey's Baptism"
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Synopsis[]

Archie is determined to baptize Joey, especially over Mike's express wishes against it. When Edith begins refusing to allow Archie to be with Joey alone (knowing what will happen), Archie begins getting very sneaky.

Storyline[]

Archie fears for Joey's mortal soul because he hasn't been baptized and Mike and Gloria don't want to put religion into his life. So, Archie gets the idea that while he is baptizing, that he will sneak down to the church and have it done before he gets back. Edith is completely against it, locking Archie's hat and coat in the closet and refusing to give up the key. While Edith's back is turned, Archie grabs a hat and sweater out of the box that is going to the poor, grabs Joey out of his pram and runs to the church. The minister refuses to perform the baptism without the parent's consent, so Archie sneaks into the sanctuary and does it himself.

Trivia[]

  • References to the 1950's The Dinah Shore Chevy Show and the 1940 film Waterloo Bridge are both made in the episode.

Quotes[]


  • Archie: [conversing with Reverend Chong, who is unwilling to baptize Joey against his parents' wishes] No, see, what I had in mind was this, uh, I would like to slip a few dollars into the, into the poor-box, see, which don't necessarily have to wind up there, see? And, uh, now, uh, we don't have to tell, uh, the, uh, Reverend Fletcher there...
  • Rev. Chong: (correcting Archie's mispronouncing of Rev. Felcher's name) Felcher.
  • Archie: Whatever. We don't have to tell him nothin' about it, see. What do you say, Chang?
  • Rev. Chong: (correcting Archie over the mispronouncing of his name) Chong.
  • Archie: Whatever!
  • Rev. Chong: (sarcastically mispronoucing Archie's last name in response to Archie mispronouncing his) I say, *No* "Mr Binker!"
  • Archie: Bunker.
  • Rev. Chong: (sarcastically) Whatever!

  • Edith: (Edith argues with Archie over whether Joey should be baptized) Oh, no, I don't think it's right. We can't do that without Mike and Gloria's permission.

Archie Bunker: [upset] To Hell with permission. Jeez, permission, permission. That's one of the things wrong with the world today. There's too much permission. Let me tell ya somethin'. When the missionaries went into darkest Africa to bring God to the natives, you think they asked their permission? Like Hell! They dragged 'em out of the trees and right down to the river. And they held them under there until they seen the light. And the natives was glad about that, 'cause that's the way they found God. And then later on, when they was chained in the bottom of the slave ships, why, they was happy, because they had somebody to pray to, there, see?. Which proves that for everybody's own good, you gotta use force. That's the Christian way!


  • Archie: (Archie shares with Gloria his reasoning about why Joey should be baptized) Listen, little girl, every kid needs to be somethin'. And everybody's gotta know what he is. That way at least his own kind won't throw rocks at him. If he's nuthin', they'll all throw rocks at him. And I know, I threw many a rock in my day!
  • Gloria: You used to throw rocks at kids and you call yourself religious?
  • Archie: No, well, wait a minute, wait a minute. Throwin' rocks is, what do you call, an age-old religious custom, there, for bringin' people around. All your ancient people, there, threw rocks, until they got axes and spears, and later on guns to do God's work!

  • Archie: Bein' baptized makes you religious!
  • Mike: Oh, come on, Arch. Joey was circumcised. It doesn't make him Jewish!
  • Archie: No, it made him holler, though!

Cast (in credits order)[]

Main cast[]

Guest stars/Recurring cast[]

More External Liinks[]


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